Acts 5: 1-16
At first reading, I was struck by how strong my own desire is to make myself look good to myself. And to others. There are surely more things to learn from this story, but I can’t get over this one.
In the first part of the passage we learn everyone was selling possessions and giving to the new church. (Why aren’t we doing that?)
There is no evidence that God commanded to give 100% of what you sold. These folks sold possessions and gave part to the church, kept some money, so far so good, then told everyone “here is the money from our sale”.
My read is they wanted to look good and be thought of well. I am aware of doing this on many levels. Sometimes I wash our car to look good. Sometimes I cherry pick and twist facts to soothe my conscience. Sometimes I wear nice new clothes. For what?
Most times, I only tell my Mom about good things I did. I’m sure she knows the truth, but controlling the narrative seems like a near mandatory way to progress.
Sometimes I twist details so quickly in my head, almost unconsciously to convince myself and others I didn’t make a mistake. There are lies of omission in recounting the narrative. Yesterday, I was working late (due to a tardy start) and had an email drafted to a colleague. Just before I clicked send, a thought darted through “if you wait an hour to send this, they will think you are more diligent”. This is an insidious tendency.
Is this a broad human tendency? Motivated reasoning? How does it start? How does it develop?
I wonder if this tendency is what God was trying to squelch by killing them. That was such an Old Testament thing to do? I thought we were in a new era now. Do you think Peter was as casual about God killing Sapphira as the author made him sound? “you messed up like your husband, now you gonna die”
I get that God wants honesty. Perhaps this is more than not telling outright lies. I need to be more honest with myself and others on a near subconscious level and give up trying to make myself look good.
Another rambling with more question marks than periods